Tuesday, January 03, 2006


911, emergency services.

Bus, train and ferry timetable information line.
Pronounced "thirteen fifteen hundred".

when the first whitefellas (white people) came to stay in Australia.

See: Australia Day


Anzac day
memorial day for Australian and New Zealand troops. Always falls on the 25th of April, always a public holiday.

Occurs in Australia and New Zealand and in Australian and New Zealand official buildings (eg, embassies) and armed forces bases around the world.
ANZAC means Australian & New Zealand Armed Corps. There's dawn services at war memorials, there's a march through the city streets by those who've served in past and present wars, there's acknowledgement and commemoration of sacrifice and remembrance of mates (buddies) who never came home, sprigs of rosemary are worn on lapels and small flags waved, it's the one day of the year two-up is legal in pubs, clubs & backyards and old men cry in the street. Think of Memorial day & Veterans' day rolled into one. But quieter. And we generally don't hang flags out of our windows.



Aussie Aussie Aussie
sports supporters' chant used at international events, "oi!" means "hey!"

One person, or a small group, calls the first line to start the chant and the crowd responds. The chant is usually performed with little aggression and few gestures, though there may be some foot stamping for volume where needed. 'Oi!' means 'hey!'

Caller: Aussie Aussie Aussie!
Response: Oi Oi Oi!
Caller: Aussie!
Response: Oi!
Caller: Aussie!
Response: Oi!
Caller: Aussie Aussie Aussie!
Response: Oi Oi Oi!

Repeat until shouted down by opposing international team's supporters.

Australian Army

Australia Day
marking and celebrating the beginning of white Australia in 1788.
26th of January every year. A public holiday.

There's fireworks and public singing. The singing is the quiet embarrassed public singing we do for the national anthem (Advance Australia Fair) and the un-official national anthem (Waltzing Mathilda).

Australia Day marks and celebrates the beginning in 1788 of the British colony that became white Australia. Survival Day marks the same event seen from the point of view of indigenous Australians who were inhabiting Australia at the time of the British takeover and have been smacked around ever since.


Autumn begins on the first of March. Yep, that's right, it's Fall in Australia when it's Spring in America. Australia is in the Southern Hemisphere (bottom half of the world), America is in the Northern (top half of the world). Our Winter starts on the 1st of June, our Spring on the 1st of September and our Summer on the 1st of December. Cyclone season and bushfire season usually start in October and end in February.


barbeque, outdoor cooker

The centrepiece of the suburban backyard. Frequently a large brick thing made of leftover house bricks and bathroom tiles.

See also: snag sanger

bacon sarnie
bacon sandwich

Popular among men with professional bumcrack (plumbers, brickies, labourers) and former Poms.

banged up
behind bars, doing time, imprisoned.


We use barbeque as adjective and noun not a verb, i.e., "Today's chef's special is barbequed barra."


barra, barramundi
big flat fish about the size of a large bass

It's yummy. And fierce. A popular catch in sports fishing.

Barra facts & photo

1. bad thing or situation

Examples include:
"It's a bastard." (It's a bad thing)
"Give me a hand, I can't get a hold of the bastard." (Give me a hand, I can't get hold of the thing/animal/person.)

2. bad person

See poor bastard.

public toilet or other place where guys loiter in the hope of shagging other guys

Beats are the only point of contact some closeted guys have with the community. The police in some countries use entrapment at beats and arrest you for shagging in a public place. Also bashers and muggers work in beats. You can get a safe anonymous fuck at a sauna or bathhouse.

bicycle or motorcycle

dog of mixed breeds, literally: bits of this and bits of that.

Aboriginal person, black person native to Australia.

This is NOT a racial slur.

See also: whitefella


Also known as the Old Dart.

boat people
wetbacks, illegal refugees

Australia is an island. So they come in boats. Via Indonesia mostly.

white trash, mullet wearer, may be person of little education.

In the UK: chav.


1. testicles

I.e., a kick in the bollocks.

2. bullshit

Example: 'That's bollocks.'

Both definitions are used mainly by Australians who've recently migrated from the UK.

book-maker, professional or amateur who takes bets

bottle shop
liquor store

cup, groin guard

As used in cricket to protect the bollocks.

Brizzie / Brissie / Brisvegas

Capital of Queensland, the north-eastern state of Australia.

feral horse

Horses are not native to Australia. Like most feral animals in Australia, the horse was brought from England by white people. White people first came to stay in Australia in 1788.

budgie smugglers

Speedos, male swimwear similar to briefs. A budgie is a budgerigar, a small bird. What with shrinkage and being tossed about in the surf, it looks like you're smuggling budgies.

Photo of budgie smugglers

1. expression of regret

Example: "Bugger. I've stuffed it up."

2. person

Example: "You poor bugger."

not very much

tired, worn out or broken.

Examples include:
"I'm buggered." (I'm tired.)
"My brakes are buggered." (My brakes are worn out.)
"This is buggered." (This is broken.)

bugger off
go away

a bad place.

Example: "It's gone to buggery." (It's gone to hell.)

buggerising around
mucking about, messing about, being silly, not paying attention, not doing your job.


broken, not working properly

Examples include:
"The car is bung." (The car is not working properly or at all.)
"That one is bung." (That one is broken.)


outlaw from colonial (1788 - 1901) times

Ned Kelly is our most famous bushranger and one of our national heroes. There's a movie called Ned Kelly starring Our Heath (Heath Ledger of Brokeback Mountain fame). It's accurate enough.


Captain Cook

Australian rhyming slang


come on

As in "Carn the Doggies!" (Come on the Fremantle Bulldogs!).

1. drugstore.
2. scientist who works with chemicals.


chook strangler
SAS soldier, Special Air Services, secret soldiers, similar to Navy Seals.

They are trained to live off the land when they have to and that's why they're called 'chook stranglers'. Chooks are chickens and a handy source of food for a secret soldier.

SAS now and then
SAS on Wiki

Chrissy / Chrissie

Chrissy pressy / Chrissie pressie
Christmas present, Christmas gift

chucking a sickie
taking a paid sick day off work when you're not sick enough or are just plain fakin' it.

chucking a wobbly
throwing a temper tantrum

picture theatre (theater)

rectum (men), rectum or vagina (women)

Usage example: "Bugger off or I'll give you a kick up the clacker."

Explanation thingy, lacking only a photo of Jack Thompson looking scary in a 70s moustache, which I'll replace with a proper thingy when I'm to the job

Cobb & Co.
19th century horse-drawn coach company providing a coach and mail service to parts of the country not serviced by trains

family jewels, male genitals

convicted criminal transported by the British legal system to an Australian colony such as Port Jackson (Sydney) between 1788 and 1868.

1. Captain James Cook

Cook is to Australia what Christopher Colombus is to America.

Born Yorkshire (England) 1728, Cook captained the Endeavour of the Royal Navy (British), landed at Botany Bay on the 29th of April 1770. More exploration and mapping of Australia's coastline followed. Cook was the most accurate map-maker of his day and his maps have undergone few revisions since. He was killed in the Sandwich Islands (Hawaii) on the 14th of February 1779, due to a misunderstanding, one year after white settlement of Australia.

Cook at Australian Dictionary of Biography - includes photo

2. last English captain to successfully tour Australia

Joke made about the English cricket team's record for wins against Australia.

cop, police officer

criminal convicted in Australia during or after the transportation of convicts from England to Australia between 1788 and 1868.

See also: convict (above)


person or persons of a sexy gender

Usage example: A says "That new guy in Accounts is a nice bit of crumpet."
B says "Hands off, bitch, I saw him first!"

cup of

When one is offered a cuppa one is being offered a cuppa tea (cup of tea) or a cuppa coffee (cup of coffee). When the offer is phrased simply as "Cuppa?" the answer is "Tea please/ Coffee please/ No thanks I'm right". A cup of hot chocolate is referred to as "a hot chocolate". Cuppa-soup is packet soup drunk from a cup and is referred to as "cuppa soup".




look, glance

Useage example: "I've had a decko at your brakes and they're buggered."

Dems, Democrats
Australian Democrats

Political party not like the American Democrats, further to the left than then but nothing like as far to the left as communists.

See also: Liberal and Labor.


derro, dero
derelict, hobo, bum.

pecker head.

diesel dyke
bull dyke

give someone a lift on your bicycle, either perched precariously on the handlebars or seated painfully on the rack at the back with their legs sticking out to avoid the spokes.


1. not quite right

Example: Davo says, "You remember that teacher Mr Smith? Got picked up for touching kids."
Bazza says, "Jesus. I knew that bastard was dodgy."

2. worn out

Example: Mechanic says, "Mate, you might wanna think about some new brakes."
Bazza says, "Why? Bit dodgy are they?"

3. sick

Example: Boss says, "Hello. Handy Hardware."
Davo says, "Morning, boss. Listen, I won't make it in today. Feeling a bit dodgy."


A useful insult whilst driving: "Stay in yer own bloody lane, you drongo!"


Often refers specifically to an outside toilet as found in the back garden of some old houses and behind many old shops.


freaking, fricking.

Euphemism for "fucking".

Also: frigging.

effing and blinding
swearing and cursing

Blinding is a euphemism for "bloody".

Express Post
Fed Ex



Those you call fags we call poofters.

fag, homosexual male

fairy bread
lightly buttered slices of bread covered with multi-coloured chocolate sprinkles and cut into triangles

Considered by Vangaman's children and many others to be "the single greatest contribution to party-going Australia has ever made".

Photo of fairy bread

fairy floss
cotton candy

female genital area

Don't pat strangers on the fanny when you come down here.

1. feral animal
imported species that's escaped and now lives wild.

2. went feral
suddenly behaved with abnormal aggression.

Usage example: 'Neal went feral and abused staff' (Iguana-gate)

3. person who's dropped out of mainstream society and often wears dreadlocks and lives in a small community on the outskirts of a city.


We call a flat a flat tyre.

flicks, the


We got four footy codes. AFL/Aussie Rules, League, Union and the soccer.

four wheel drive
4WD, 4x4, four by four, SUV, off-road vehicle.

free TV
Network TV

See also: Pay TV

freaking, fricking, fucking



gold coin
1. $1 or $2 coin

2. gold coin donation

Lots of charity events and amateur sporting events have "gold coin donation" on their flyers and adverts and there's someone at the gate with a bucket for you to chuck your gold coin into. Not chucking in a gold coin is considered stingy (pronounced stin-jee) and the person not chucking it in is a bloody mongrel.

family jewels, groin

go on

Usage example: Yelled at strippers by straight blokes in pubs, "Gorn! Show us yer map of Tassie!"

gossip, skinny, info, news

So "Gimme the goss" means "What's the skinny?".

booze, alcohol

Usage example:

Davo: "Hey, Simmo, how are ya?"
Simmo: "Orright. Whatcha up to?"
Davo: "Gotta pop in the bottle shop for some grog for the barbie."

undies, underwear, knickers, jocks, pants

Australian rhyming slang. Reg Grundy (TV producer or summat) + undies = grundies.


1. blowjob, oral sex.
2. haircut.

a guest of Her Majesty
in prison, in gaol, in jail

The official head of the Commonwealth of Australia is the Queen of England. Some of our government departments have had or still have "H.M." or "Her Majesty" in their names. The prisons services used to. Now they're mostly called the Department of Corrective Services or similar. But we still use the term "a guest of Her Majesty" to mean someone who's in prison or about to be.

Department of Corrective Services, Western Australia
New South Wales Department of Corrective Services - notice the crown representing the Commonwealth and thus the English monarch in the site's header image.

Hills' hoist
umbrella shaped clothesline

The hoist bit refers to you being able to raise and lower them by a winder handle.

My grandparents used to put a canvas cover over theirs at Christmas and my grandfather sat under it dressed as Santa and handed out the Christmas presents to us kids.

In the opening ceremony of the 2000 Olympics in Sydney, some of the dancers wore giant Hills' Hoists on their heads. It was fun.

Hungry Jacks
Burger King




briefs, Y fronts, mens' underpants.



New Zealander

We do not eat Kiwis. Not in the traditional sense anyways.

kiwi fruit
the fruit called "kiwi" in America

KMs / kms

Pronounced 'kay ems' or 'kays'.
1 km = .62 miles.


Labor party
left of centre politcal party

The party to which Prime Minister Kevin Rudd belongs. Rudd is the PM who said Sorry.

Labor's website

ALP at Wiki



Liberal party
right of centre political party

Libs' website

Libs at Wiki

a little lie down
1. a short nap due to fatigue, illness or drunkness
2. masturbation


See also: dunny

look at moy / look at moi
look at me

Catch-phrase of those foxy morons Kath & Kim


map of Tassie
female pubic area

So called because a hairy one is similar in shape to the map of Tasmania.

Usage example: Yelled at strippers by straight blokes in pubs, "Gorn! Show us yer map of Tassie!"

Mardi Gras
Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras

Mardi Gras is a month long festival of queer arts, theatre, film, history talks, fund raising for BGF etc etc.

It culminates in the Parade through Sydney which is led by the Dykes on Bikes, participated in by marching boys, marching dykes, PFLAGgers and their kids, coppers, civilians, individuals and groups from Sydney, Australia and all over the world. It is watched by cheering crowds of Sydneysiders queer and straight, young and old, homophobic and normal.

buddy, pal, dude.

In the vocative it is used in the singular. That is, we refer to our mates as "mates" but do not address them collectively as "mates". The Australian language and accent you see in American movies and television is half guesswork and half bullshit. Actors employed to portray Australians in America include South Africans, Britons, New Zealanders and, very occasionally, Australians.

cell phone

Short for mobile phone.

Pronounced mo-bile not moble.

1. bad or selfish person

2. dog of uncertain breed

Usage example: "Some mongrel stole my car."

skeeter, mosquito

Member of Parliment

Australia's political system is based on the Westminster system, the English one.

Mr Whippy
icecream van

Mr Whippy drives a pink and white van and plays Greensleeves. He is to be found in suburban streets, at the beach, outside the footy and cricket and other venues where large amounts of citizens gather.

hot and sticky weather, humid

1. a fish

2. hockey hair


nope, no

National Service in the military

Finished in the mid 1960s or thereabouts.

species of plant or animal naturally occuring in Australia

Example: "Cows are not native to Australia."

Does NOT refer to Australian Aborigines, the black, traditional inhabitants of Australia.

Ned Kelly
an outlaw from colonial times (1788 - 1901)

See: bushranger and Ned Kelly.

Ned's red
cheap crappy wine


Popularised by that excellent piss-take on suburbia, Kath & Kim

New South Wales

The most populous state in Australia. Above Victoria, below Queensland and next to South Australia. Sydney is its capital and where the British set up camp when they came to stay in 1788.

nope, no



As in "Oi! Stop that!" Not oy. Oy is from oy vey. Oi is from oi.

Old Dart, the
England or the whole of the UK.

old money, the
Australian currency pre-1966

We changed from pounds, shillings and pence (British money) to dollars in 1966.

"The old money" is also used to refer to imperial measurements:
Davo: "Ninety millimetres."
Simmo: "What's that in the old money?"
Davo: "Thirty five and three eighths inches."

good on you, you go girl!, High five! Congratulations!

all right

Bazza: "Davo. How you going?"
Davo: "Orright. You?"

Our Kylie
Kylie Minogue also known as the Singing Budgie

An Australian pop princess, her music is big with disco bunnies. A mate of mine went to war in Iraq with Kylie on his iPod. It ain't all death metal in the army.


pay tv

a little hungry

pension, the
old age pension paid by the Department of Social Security

We do not get a Social Security number when we're born. We only get one if or when we receive some form of Social Security payment such as the pension.

honey, love, sweetheart, darling, babe, etc.

Phar Lap
the horse that won the 1930 Melbourne Cup

One of our great national heroes. Phar Lap was a champion race horse in the 1930s. After he died his heart was found to be abnormally large. Hence the saying "a heart as big as Phar Lap's".

pig's arse
bullshit, no way

An expression of disbelief or refusal.

Example: A says, "I fucked Johnny Depp." B says, "Pig's arse! You never did!"

1. pinball machine.

2. apron, of the sort worn to protect the clothes from damage. Possibly of British origin.

1. piss, urine
2. alcohol

piss, on the

Example: A says, "Whatcher doing tonight?" B says, "Going out on the piss. You?"


When we say someone's pissed they're drunk, not angry.

piss take
send up, spoof

See also: taking the piss (has examples)

pom, pommy
limey, British person, person from the UK.

An affectionate insult, nowhere near as harsh as the American word limey.

pommy bastard
See pommy.

England, the UK, Britain.

poor bastard
expression of sympathy

Example: A says, "You hear about Dave? His guy left him, he pranged his car and his dog died." B says, "Shit! Poor bastard."

poor bugger
expression of sympathy

Milder than "poor bastard".

pollie, pollies
politician, politicians.

1. swimming pool
2. billiards

poof, poofter
fag, faggot, homosexual male


mailman or mailwoman

vehicle or traffic accident

Example: A says, "Where's your car?" B says, "Nasty prang yesterday. Totalled the bastard."

pressie / prezzie
present, gift

Prime Minister
President. Sort of. Close enough.

Prime Miniature
John Wanker Howard.

Howard is a former Prime Minister of Australia. We voted him out on the 24th of November 2007. Our current Prime Minister is Julia Gillard (our first girl PM) who ousted Kevin Rudd, the guy who apologised to the Aborigines. We go to the polls again on the 21st of September 2010.



Northern-most eastern state of Australia. The state capital is Brisbane, known sarcastically as Brisvegas.


Royal Australian Airforce

Royal Australian Navy

1. redback spider, also known as the dunny spider, due to its love of lurking in outdoor toilets.

2. Redback beer.

car license number, sticker on windshield giving date of registration

Short for registration.

the rock / the big red rock
Uluru, formerly known as Ayer's Rock

That big red rock in the middle of Australia all the tourists want to visit. If Australia has a physical heart, Uluru is it.


The western reds are the big ones. Like that one in that appalling movie Kangaroo Jack, which incidentally was not an Australian movie. It was just filmed here by some bloody Hollywood crowd. The grey kangaroos are either eastern greys (smaller) or wallabies (smaller than eastern greys).

screw, fuck, make the sex, have sex

We do not root for our teams, we barrack for them. They can root for themselves.

Returned and Services League

Formed during World War I "to perpetuate the close ties of friendship created by mutual service in the Australian Defence Force or allied forces, to maintain a proper standard of dignity and honour among all past and present serving members of the Defence Force". Nowadays the NSW RSLs look a lot like casinos. The ones in Perth (WA) are still more like Senior Citizens clubs.


sausage sanger
sausage sandwich

See also snag sanger.

seachange, seachanging
cashing out, downshifting, leaving your 9-to-5 life and opting for a simpler life with less credit cards and more time.


fuck, screw, make the sex, have sex.

Shagging can lead to shagger's back.

1. bad, awful, hideous.

Example: A says, "I feel shithouse this morning. Got a bit drunk last night."

2. toilet.

Example: B says, "Bazza is built like a brick shithouse. He's a big bloke."

fraudulent or near fraudulent

Dave says, "You hear about Bazza's new car? Five minutes out of the dealer and the clutch is gone."
Simmo says, "Yeah, well, that's what you get when you buy from Shonky Bros."

Also: dodgy

person of short stature

Example: "Met this guy off Gaydar on the weekend. Looks as good as his picture, great face, great body. That he stands up and he's a complete short-arse! 5 foot nothing!"

slag off
trash someone's reputation

insult members of an opposing sports team, usually during a game

The Australian national cricket team is notorious for sledging.


1. sausage

2. sensitive new age guy, a nice guy, a guy who doesn't treat women like servants or inferiors and acknowledges he has an emotional life.

Note: this does not mean a submissive guy. In between being an prick and being a doormat.

snag sanger
sausage sandwich

Very popular at public barbeques such as charity fund-raisers, fun runs or other open to the public sporting events.

Making the snag sanger: line up at the trestle table, accept your one or two slices of white bread, shuffle along the queue and accept a red hot sausage plonked onto your bread direct from the barbie, answer "yep" or "no thanks" to onions, shuffle along to the next spot and answer "tomato" or "barbeque thanks" to the question of "what sauce?". Your snag sanger is now complete. Eat standing up and leaning forward slightly to avoid damage to clothes.


Example: "Giss a snog then." (Give us (me) a kiss.)

necking, kissing

Not tonsil hockey but may involve tonsil hockey, according to how you feel about other peeps' saliva.


There are endless jokes about solicitor's briefs.

hottie, sexually attractive person.

Example: Jared Padalecki is a big hunk of spunk.

Putting "Padalecki" into Google Images is heartily recommended.

hottie, sexually attractive person.

squiz, squizz

Said to be Australian rhyming slang for crook (criminal) with the criminal connection being 1920s Melbourne gangster Squizzy Taylor.

nekkid, nakey, in the buff, naked.



Steve Irwin AKA the Crocodile Hunter
Bit of a showpony but he put his money where his mouth was, as we found out after he carked it. Bought up land with his own money to save it for the endangered species and so on. Onya, Stevo.

sticky, have a
check out, stick your nose into, investigate

Example: "I had a sticky at your brakes and they're buggered."

sticky beak
nosey parker

tight-fisted, cheap, close with a buck, short arms deep pockets

Pronounced stin-jee, not sting-ee.

Australian as she was spoke by Steve Irwin.

Does not make the speaker appear educated but is very popular with Hollywood movie makers. Thanks for nothing, Hollywood.

small bottle of beer, shorter than a longneck.

superannuation, 401K

Super is compulsory for all full-time employees. It's paid by the employer out of your gross pay. You can contribute some extra to it if you like. Super funds are mostly administered by private companies and a significant number of us assume our super will have been embezzled by the time we're old enough to collect it.

suspicious, suspect, dodgy.

Usage example: B says, "I didn't see him steal it but he's definitely a bit suss."

suss it out
check it out, investigate it.

Example: A says, "My steering's a bit wonky. Better suss it out soon."



Technical and Further Education, trade school, community college.

It runs apprenticeship courses, secretarial courses, small business and computer courses, catch-up classes in high school maths, English, physics and so on and hobby classes (art, cooking, languages, etc) at night. It is government run, of a high standard and preferred by employers.
TAFE NSW website.

taking the piss
sending someone or something up, taking the mickey, making fun, spoofing, satire.

At no point is urine ingested.

Australian free-to-air TV programmes take the piss:
The Games
Kath & Kim
Good News Week
Mark Loves Sharon
The Hollowmen

The Gruen Transfer is a documentary deconstructing advertising, with a satire component. So it falls at least partly into the category of taking the piss.

American TV programmes that take the piss are: The Simpsons, Futurama, My Name is Earl, Family Guy.

American actor taking the piss out of Eye of the Tiger


The big island off the bottom right hand corner of Australia. (Map)

See also: map of Tassie

ten pound Poms
British subjects who took part in the assisted migration scheme bringing Britons to Australia in the 1950s and 60s.

Ten pounds is an amount of money, Poms are British people and Australia was (and is) still part of the British Commonwealth, hence the choice of Britons as migrants. The ten pounds then is a few hundred dollars in today's money. Adults paid and their children under 18 got free passage. The journey out from England took weeks and the ships used were often pre-World War II ocean liners that had been used as warships before being converted back to passenger ships for assisted migration. My grandparents were ten pound Poms.


flip flops

Yeah, we got what you call a thong. We call it a g-string. We have a good giggle when you guys talk about wearing thongs as underwear.

A thong

1. can of beer

2. aluminium dingy

Usage example: A says, "I'm going out in the tinny tomorrow. You coming?" B says, "Righto, and I'll bring a few tinnies."

sweat pants or the whole tracksuit

tracky daks
sweat pants, bottom half of a tracksuit

transportation of a convict or convicts to Australia by the British legal system in the late 18th and 19th centuries.

Between 1788 (founding of British colony at Port Jackson (Sydney)) and 1868, British criminals known in Australia as convicts were sent by ship to serve their sentences as labourers. In Australia the word "convict" refers only to those colonial convicts and modern convicts are referred to as "crims".

1. diarrhoea

2. sulky racing, horse and buggy racing

Usage example: "I wanted to go to the trots with my mates on Saturday but I had the trots and stayed home".

game of chance played by tossing two coins of equal size (preferably two old pennies) up into the air from a short flat stick. Bets are placed on how they fall.

tyranny of distance
the considerable distance between Australia (and New Zealand) and the rest of the English-speaking world

Before motor-powered ships and planes, it took weeks and sometimes months to travel from Australia and New Zealand to the UK. In a plane it's still one of the longest flights in the world at 22-24 hours.



U-turn, to turn in the road in order to drive in the opposite direction.

Pronounced "you-ee".

underpants, underwear.

UK, the

university, college

What we call college is usually a privately-run girls' school or evening school offering office and business skills, languages and some hobby skills. TAFE (Technical and Further Education) is a college but is referred to by its acronym.

pick-up truck

Short for utility.


toast and sandwich spread that looks like boot polish, smells like boot polish and tastes like boot polish.


South-eastern state of Australia. Below NSW and next to South Australia. Home to VB (Victoria Bitter, a beer) and the Melbourne Cup horse race. Vic's capital is Melbourne. Melbourne is known as the city with "four seasons in one day".


small version of the kangaroo

Biologists will tell they're quite different but they look the same to you and me.

player on Australia's national rugby union team

1. masturbate. "Having a quiet wank."
2. bullshit. "This is a lot of wank."

1. literally, one who masturbates.

2. colloquially, idiot, jerk, person whose behaviour is for self-gratification only, John Winston Howard former Prime Minister of Australia.

Sydney term for urban rednecks

It comes from the fondness of rednecks from the outer western suburbs of Sydney to jam themselves into a souped-up sedan on a Saturday night, zigzag along the freeway at high speeds and zoom through red lights in the CBD alternatively yelling "fuckin’ poofteeeeeeeers!"and "show us yer tits!"

See also: yobbo.

the Wet
sub-monsoonal rain season in northern Australia

The top third of Australia is sub-tropical. It has two seasons: hot & wet and hotter & wetter. The Wet is monsoonal rain in October - November.


white person

Not an insult. Also see: blackfella.

1. the flu or similar virus

Definition in action.

2. Australian of Greek, Italian, Macedonian, Spanish, etc. descent.

Brought into popular use by a group of excellent Greek Australian comedians in a stage show called Wogs Out Of Work.

party pooper


The cowardly sort. Not the furry sort.


Nuffing here yet. Come back when I've got off my arse.


the Yarra

1. Yarra River

2. Yarra Valley

The Yarra River runs through Melbourne and the Yarra Valley is a wine growing district upstream from Melbourne.

yup, yes

lout, rural or urban redneck

Basically, any idiot likely to lean out a car window and yell "show us yer tits!".

a long time

Usage example: "It took me yonks to get there."

you (plural)

Pronounced yooz.

Commonly used by bogans and boxers and indicative of poor education.

"I love youse all" is the catch phrase of Australian champion boxer Jeff Fenech. In Fenech's case it is a perfectly acceptable example of Aboriginal English and therefore not indicative of class or education.


Come back when I've got me arse into gear and put something here.

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